We hate to do this but...

The fate of this baby doll is in your hands

Subscription drive time: We hate to do this but... (Image by G. A. Nuttall)

Dear Friend,

Thank you for being part of the Vancouver Gazette community. Today marks a very special milestone: Vancouver Gazette’s 463rd day in circulation.

As you know, 463 is a prime number, which makes this day special. Not Sophie Germain prime special, but special nonetheless.

463 also corresponds to a notable passage in the Christian Bible¹. You’ll surely recall Psalm 46:3:

“Though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging.”

Not quite Psalm 46:1 ² special, but special nonetheless.

In honour of the occasion, and to keep the day special, we’re launching a subscription drive.

We don’t usually do this, but as our friends at PBS say:

“Your support makes it possible for us to bring you programs you love, enabling us to continue bringing you trusted news and information.”

At the Vancouver Gazette, we blush to ask you this. But still, we feel it’s important to ask: Won’t you join our Sustaining Circle?

A monthly gift ensures the Vancouver Gazette remains vibrant and independent, no matter what. Our sustaining members are the backbone of quality news.

Subscribe now. Help us reach our next milestone: 1,000,000 subscribers and followers. No extra mailings. No tote bags. Just a strange, stubborn commitment to what this is.

Subscribe or follow Vancouver Gazette by midnight, June 25, Saint-Jean-Baptiste Day ³, and we will spare this beloved porcelain baby doll.

If we fail to meet this goal of one million subscribers and followers by midnight, June 25, then we will push this precious antique porcelain baby doll off the side of the BC Ferries’ MV Queen of Capilano, consigning her forever to the frigid waters of the Howe Sound. Half a league⁴ from land and two hundred fathoms deep⁵. The antique baby doll’s mommy, Little Mary-Lou, has been made aware of the situation and accepts these terms.

Though the Howe Sound’s waters roar and foam and the mountain of Passage Island quakes with their surging, we can spare this beautiful and well-loved porcelain doll from Neptune’s wrath only with the support of regular readers like you. Upstanding, salt of the earth readers like you. Good looking, Charismatic, and smart readers like you.

Be a difference maker and help Vancouver Gazette thrive for generations to follow.

Subscribe or follow Vancouver Gazette by midnight, June 25, and little Mary-Lou’s cherished baby doll will be spared the icy depths of the Howe Sound.

Selah!
G. A. Nuttall
Membership Director
Vancouver Gazette

P.S. The doll’s name is Milly and Mary-Lou loves her very much.

1. King James Version.

2. Psalm 46:1 — “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.”

3. Deadline in Universal Time (UTC): 07:00 UTC on June 25, 2025

4. That’s far.

5. That’s deep.